My church, St. Frances Cabrini, in Littleton, is cray. Mostly because we have a tendency to ignore the “universal” aspect of the Church and decide to use whatever cycle we feel like. So this Lenten season has been super frustrating, because everywhere I look, the readings posted are different than the ones we are doing. BUMMER CITY because one of the things I love about the Universal Church is, in fact, united liturgy.
All that being said, I do love my church dearly, even though it is a circle church.However, something else annoyed my sensibilities today. Because we perpetually use cycle A during Lent, the fifth Sunday is the story of Lazarus rising from the dead (it goes along with RCIA and the scrutinies, so it makes sense, but still. annoying). One of my favorite verses in the entire Bible occurs in this reading: “Jesus wept.” (John 11:35) How profound! This is the shortest verse in the Bible, yet it does the most to remind us of the humanity of our Divine Savior. He who is God wept for the loss of His dear friend. He who can raise the dead, who eventually lose His life for the sake of all mankind, wept. We cannot ignore the depth of Jesus, true God and true Man, weeping. It is beyond us. Sometimes, we get so wrapped up in the divinity of Christ that His humanity seems unfathomable. He could not save us without coming down to our level, walking our roads, and exploring our emotions. And yet, despite the beauty and inexplicable goodness of these two words, the Deacon swept right over them. Just. Said them. Like they are nothing. I was so angry. Also I was angry because I want Jesus to weep for me, to know that I affect Jesus’ humanity as much as Lazarus does, but that is not the point. The homily that the Deacon provided was great. But it did not reflect on Jesus weeping, so I was bitterly disappointed. Especially since Jesus was planning to raise Lazarus from the dead anyway… He KNEW what was happening, and was still overcome with grief. And that is a beautiful mystery. Maybe I should be a deacon and write homilies about how the two-fold identity of Jesus is not something to glaze over during Mass. Just kidding. I would be a terrible deacon. Starting with the fact that I am a woman and then throw in a bunch of other reasons… yeah. no good.